6. HE WAS RIDICULOUSLY FORGETFUL.
People can forget dates and times, I understand that, but to forget my birth name? After years of dating? It was all the small details about me that any boyfriend should know off the top of his head about his girlfriend—things like favorite flowers and favorite food. He just couldn’t be bothered to remember these unique details about me and it made the relationship feel impersonal. If I find myself missing him, reminding myself of how ignorant he was a lot of the time makes me loathe him instantly.
7. I WAS NEVER NEVER PRIORITIZED.
You ever play dodgeball in gym class and the team captains pick their team members one by one? The strong, athletic kids got picked first and the smallest kids with the weakest throws got left for last. That feeling of being picked last is what I experienced all too often with my ex. It was always clubbing before me, business calls before me, chilling with his boys before me. I felt like the kid that got picked last, every time he had a choice between spending time with me and doing something else. I miss him often but reminding myself of how unimportant I was to him makes me never want to waste my time on him again.
8. HE WAS SEVERELY LACKING IN THE ROMANCE DEPARTMENT.
Romance truly was dead, at least for us. I see my roommate’s boyfriend bringing her roses and cooking for her while she studies. These kind, romantic gestures always seemed like a dream to me. Romance isn’t hard, and if it’s the right guy, it’s incredibly easy to do small things that will make your girlfriend’s day. Every time I miss my ex, I look to my friend’s relationships and I automatically cannot imagine settling for him again.
9. HE NEVER RESPECTED MY FRIENDS THE WAY HE SHOULD HAVE.
My friends are royalty to me. They’re my family and they have taken care of me in my darkest hours. I expect my boyfriend to recognize this and treat them with the utmost respect. My ex always had a problem with doing that. He’d often make comments about them behind their backs, criticizing them for one thing or another. Reminding myself of how he didn’t even try to love my friends helps me to want nothing to do with him ever again.
10. HE NEVER SHOWED ME OFF.
I don’t expect to be paraded around on my boyfriend’s Instagram or anything, but is it too much to think that on my birthday at least, a small Snapchat shout-out is reasonable? He never wanted to make it known to the world that I was his girlfriend and he was proud and happy about this fact. Missing him only lasts until I remind myself how little love and affection he showed me, especially in public.